American Idol

Life's guilty pleasures: Creme Broulee, Carnitas, Veal, gay sex (well, it's guilty for straight guys anyway), cigarettes smoked out behind the barn, a martini at lunch, meaningless flirtations when on the road, and . . . American Idol.

I admit it. I watch American Idol. In years gone by I've watched occasionally when I got sucked into it by Bob who is a devotee. But this year has been different. The singers have been several cuts way above what's gone on before them. People who were kicked off in the 5th and 6th week could have easily won in years past. The final few -- now the final two -- are already stars.

Think about it. When the Beatles hit America in 1964, they played the Ed Sullivan Show 3 times. Each show they did 3 numbers. That's 9 chances to perform before the American public -- and that kind of exposure has not occured before or since. That is, until Idol had Carrie, Bo and Vonzell singing what? 20 songs each over several months? By the time the show wraps, they've had more exposure than most genuine stars get in a lifetime. Even the bad ones can't help but have a following.

That's where this year is different. Everyone I saw -- almost everyone -- deserves a following. They are an amazing group.

Tonight Vonzell went home, not because she's not wonderful -- but because she's just a little too young for this kind of pressure. The other two handled it with ease and great cool. She was noticably nervous and just felt a little out of place on that big stage.

Of course, I could get all sanctimonious about the artificiality of it all, about how the industry creates pop stars to market to us and the creations have little to do with actual artistic expression. I really dislike Nsync and Backstreet Thugs and Britney and Christina and . . . oh, let's not forget J-lo. I believe they were picked by the machine and marketed to us very carefully so that the current fat cats could buy more cars and cocaine. And we've all gotten dumb enough to follow along like kids after the pied piper. Having said that I have to admit that the boy bands have produced some pretty good stuff, and Justin Timberlake seems like he may actually have a brain. Christina, too. But paying $80 to watch Britney lipsynch? I don't get it. And honestly: has Jennifer Lopez ever done anything memorable in her entire career? Has she ever made a movie or a record that was anything more than mediocre? I think she's the most forgetable face of the new millennium.

Idol is just the enshrining of that whole process. Except that we -- us dumb and dumber Americans -- have a voice in who they're going to market to us. We get to choose. And we pick John Stevens and Justin Guarini and a dozen other talent free zeroids. But this year something happened. The kids could sing. They really could. And it was hard as hell to decide who would go and who would stay. And now they're down to two and they both got it goin on.

I'm pulling for Carrie. I think she's very fresh, where Bo is a little old and tired, despite his excellent delivery. Seems to me the best thing Bo Bice could do this week is go out and get a great haircut and shave. If he showed up next week looking like he's living in 2005 instead of 1975, it would probably put him over the top. Oh, and don't you want him to quit carrying that mic stand all over the stage? Like Constantino's wink and vamp, it's so affected, so put on.

So there you have it from an unlikely source: me. American Idol is cool. I can't wait for next week.